1 Samuel 16:7 (KJV)
But the Lord said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.
This is perhaps the most often cited “justification” to brush off accusations or justify certain behaviour.
“As long as my heart is right, it is ok.”
Do appearances really not matter? What do we read of David who is supposedly a man after God's own heart (1 Samuel 13:14)? Observe 1 Samuel 16:12 - “And he sent, and brought him in. Now he was ruddy, and withal of a beautiful countenance, and goodly to look to. And the Lord said, Arise, anoint him: for this is he.”
It seems to us that David is goodly too! However, what do we read of Jesus?
In Isaiah 53:2 – “For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.”
So what is the point? The point is that we should keep things in context and in perspective. God was addressing Samuel's viewpoint (on the guidelines of choosing a king) and using that to drive home the fact that it was most important that a person's heart be right with God. In no way are we to use that to justify whatever we like to do and label them as unimportant because "God sees our hearts"!
The fact of the matter is, the “right heart” will always motivate right action. The godly person with a true heart will always see to do so in a humble manner and not insist on his own way and dismiss any form of criticism.
An excellent example is seen in the account in Acts 11. Here, Peter was falsely accused of keeping inappropriate company. Let us observe a couple of things -
1) In spite of the seemingly petty attitude of the Jews, judging by the outcome, they were most likely approaching from the angle of trying to clarify rather than as the Pharisees were with Jesus, to merely find something to condemn Jesus of. What further is commendable, is the biblical approach of seeking out the party involved to clarify (c.f. Mat 18:15), rather than murmur among themselves.
It's not difficult to imagine in today's situation, the accusers would have started blasting Peter on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and whatever social media you have, all but actually confronting the person in question, making things go viral and haywire!
2) No ONE, not even the venerable apostle Peter, who is also an elder, is above reproach. Yes, if we truly love one another, it is our responsibility to seek clarification and if necessary correct and make right. There is no "close one eye" or "sweeping under the carpet" where spiritual matters are concerned. That being said, all are to be done in humility and spirit of meekness (cf. Galatians 6:1).
3) Peter's response to criticism is exemplary. There is no need to beat one's chest or give prideful excuses like "God knows my heart", or the very often abused “who are you to judge me”. All it needed was for Peter to simply clarify! In other matters, it could very well be that we are misled or mistaken. Shouldn't we be glad that someone is pointing out our mistakes? Otherwise, calmly and humbly explain.
4) Make whatever adjustments in attitude/action. If emotions run high, dial back, apologise, make right, and MOVE ON! No bad blood, no bad mouthing, no prejudice thereafter. At the end of the day, we must all emerge stronger and closer to God and one another. Our Lord Jesus Christ puts it no better, “By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.” - John 13:35. It would be a great hypocrisy on our part and a disgrace to God, should it be that we are unable to speak the truth in love and be embroiled in ugly evil surmising and back biting!
Wherefore, let us continue to be humble and teachable, never bite and devour (Galatians 5:15) but be kind and tender hearted (Romans 12:10), yet never sweeping things under the carpet, but develop true godly love by seeking the welfare of others and help one another attain our heavenly goal.